I got home from work tonight, let out the dogs, and made my final rations of the day: a bowl of steamed vegetables, half a can of albacore tuna in water, and 2 prunes, chased by half a gallon of sugar-free cranberry drink.
I've been holding steady at under 500 Kcals per day.
Ever since dinner, which was had in my room despite living alone, I've been catering to my obsession. Blogs, movies, music, rituals. That is my evening despite being told by my boss today that I was impressive with a deal we are attempting to close.
So, I was impressive at work, yet I delve deeper into my disorder as my reward?
The head says to continue on this course and even tighten the reigns. Stomach not getting small enough fast enough, menses here and causing bloat, despite the calorific lock down, still eating too much.
Do I listen to my accomplished and rational self?
No.
I listen to the destructive voice inside who seeks a slither in at every turn of my emotions.
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